Started the Lamictal this morning and I’ve already got myself paranoid about the rash. According to the patient information, it’s fairly uncommon in adults and if it appears, it appears in the first 2-8 weeks. Of course now I’m hyper aware and every time something itches, it gets me worried. It sucks to feel like your brain is making you crazy. Firstly, it sounds like the odds of me having this reaction are fairly low. Secondly, I don’t think 6.5 hours is enough time for anything adverse to happen anyway. I know the hyper awareness is normal, but that doesn’t make it suck any less. Stupid brain. I got the video study scheduled. I’ll be going in on October 10. If I have to stay 3 or 4 days, at least some of those days would be days I had off anyway.
I suppose this is another case of where my stubbornness can serve me. Even if I do feel like hiding under the covers all day, I don’t let myself go there. I may take a lot of breaks or take longer to do things, but I still get out of bed, put on clothes and make up, and make myself show up. Just putting in the effort goes a long way. In 48 hours, I’ll be on a plane to the wedding. The grown ups are leaving today, so the kittens and I have the house to ourselves for a few nights. I know getting out of town for a few days will help.
On a more positive note, I had a very productive conversation with my boss yesterday. I know he’s a straight shooter and we talked about everything from how the company operates to what he sees for me. He knows I’ve got talent and potential, it’s a matter of teaching me things that I’ll need to know in order to move up. It may not be the most interesting stuff in the world, but it’s stuff I need to know if I want to go anywhere. That’s fair. If I know these things up front, then I can take it a lot better. Don’t most people? I came away feeling like I understand everything a bit better and I know that it’s not just people getting tapped for certain positions. Amazing what you learn when you actually ask things.